Taking Our Questions to General Conference
Today Israel and I were asked to speak in church on "following the words of the prophet," and I decided to focus my remarks on the talk that Sister Wendy Watson Nelson gave when she and her husband, President Nelson, visited our stake conference in March of this year (2018). I made a voice recording of their talks on my phone so that I could go back and listen to it later, so I listened to her words again as I was preparing for my talk and thought it would be a good review for us.
Sister Nelson posed a question, “Are we ready for General Conference?” And “What can we do (in the next week) to prepare our hearts and minds to receive the messages that the Lord has for us?”
Some people prepare by:
- Having a special fast,
- Forgiving someone,
- Increasing their time in family history and temple work or
- Doing an anonymous act of service (something that requires sacrifice).
- We may need to give up one of our sins, maybe even our favorite sin, as a way to prepare our hearts for conference.
One of Sister Watson’s favorite things to do to prepare and which has helped her the most is to think about and ponder what one question we need answered from the Lord during General Conference. That is something I’ve decided to try as an experiment this Conference.
When I take that one question to Gen Conf, that the Holy Ghost will bring me the answer I’m desperately seeking. I like the idea of focusing on one question, because I have a lot of questions. I even have a few that are tabled for when I have a chance to ask Heavenly Father directly after this life, but we should focus on what one question we need answered for our circumstances now.
She told a story from when she was 24 years old at BYU in graduate school. She was engaged to be married. She was very in love and her fiancée had everything she was looking for in a husband, everything that one would check off a list. Everything was going great and she went to the temple to ask the Lord if he was the man that she should marry. And, we all know that the decision of who to choose as a spouse is a very important one.
As she and her friend were leaving the temple to walk home, her friend asked if she had gotten the answer she was seeking. She told her friend that she hadn’t really received an answer, but that she was sure everything would work out. She learned that when she says, “everything will work out,” that is when the Lord kicks things into high gear and reveals what she needs to know. At church, her bishop challenged her ward that if they had a question or a problem weighing on their mind, to take it to General Conference, and he promised that they would receive an answer.
She did what her bishop said and prepared to take the one question she most needed answered, “Should she marry this man.” She was all alone in her apartment and was recording the conference sessions on cassette tapes to send to her family in Canada. And something interesting happened that Conference. Even though no talks are assigned for General Conference, every talk was about marriage. And the message she received through the Holy Ghost was that she should not marry her fiancée at the time. At the end of the Conference, she went straight to the phone and called him and ended the engagement/ broke up with him. He was not happy and it was a really hard thing to follow.
Many years later she received a Christmas card from her former boyfriend and he wrote her a letter telling her that he had made some choices that were contrary to the teachings of the church and that he was leaving the church and his family. That was a confirmation to her that she had made the right decision.
We don’t always have such a clear confirmation. Sometimes when we get an answer from the Lord, we just need to follow in faith, knowing that it is what we should do. But we don’t always see proof that our choices are correct. I was thinking of the 9th article of faith:
"We believe all the Lord has revealed, all that he does now reveal, and we believe that he will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the kingdom of God.”
We also read in the Bible, in Amos 3:7, "Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secrets to his servants, the prophets."
We know that the Prophet receives revelation for the church and that we are able to receive personal revelation for ourselves and our families directly from the Holy Ghost.
At BYU, my favorite religion class was Teachings of the Living Prophets, taught by Brother Lloyd Newell who is the narrator of Music and the Spoken Word. We had an assignment to search through all the published messages from the past prophets, the current prophet at the time (President Gordon B. Hinckley) and the apostles, with a focus on the most recent words. At that time, my question was, "What is the Lord's message to those who suffer for mental health?" I researched, and all I could find was one talk that President Hinckley had given at a luncheon for mental health providers; it wasn’t even given at Conference. I love that now there have been lots of talks related to the topic of mental illness and depression, anxiety. I know that the Lord is mindful of those who suffer from those trials. It’s a further testimony to me that the Lord continues to reveal the messages we need for our day."
I want to share my testimony that I know that this is Lord’s church. I know that President Nelson is a true prophet who leads the church today, and I love the direction that he has been taking the church, focusing on personal revelation.
I know that if we will take a question to the Lord in preparation for Conference that we will receive an answer and we will hear what it is that we need to learn. I am thankful for our Savior, Jesus Christ, for His atonement that has provided a way for us to return to live with our Heavenly Father again someday. He has given us the beautiful gift of repentance so that we can be forgiven of our sins when we make mistakes and that we can become more like him.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Below is the full talk by Sister Wendy Watson (Nelson), Things are Not Always the Way They Appear to Be, from a BYU Devotional on March 19. 2002
Things are not always the way they appear to be. I learned this, in a very personal way, when I was about your age. I was 24, doing graduate work at BYU (Provo), wildly in love and engaged to be married. The young man seemed to be my absolute dream guy: Returned missionary, well educated, employed, musical, handsome, great social skills, loved my family, and committed to keeping the Lord’s commandments. ALL the attributes and abilities, on my “husband-to-be wish list”, were there! He had them all…or so it seemed. And talk about a courtship! He wrote me poems, songs, and letters of love. What a guy! A man with the same desires for marriage and family-and for life-as I had. Or so I thought.
I was teaching family history in my BYU ward at the time, and with some compelling insights about the importance of the temple which I had gained through this calling, I chose to receive my endowments a few months prior to the time I was to be married in the temple. What a blessing temple attendance was for me! As I returned to the temple week after week, my world view started to open up, to change. And my view of myself and my fiancé followed. I can clearly see in my mind’s eye the day that I walked out of the Provo temple, after having gone fasting and praying, seeking an answer to a question that had started to haunt me: “Should I marry this man?”. A friend who had accompanied me to the temple that day asked, “Well, did you get your question answered?” I replied: “I didn’t get an answer-but I know that everything is going to work out.”
Freeze frame. I’ve learned through subsequent experiences, that the Spirit of the Lord is involved whenever I find myself saying: “Everything is going to work out”. Little did I know just HOW everything was going to work out!
It seemed that from the very minute I said those words, the Spirit whispered to my fiancé, who was working in another state: “Show her what you’re really like.” As the days and weeks unfolded, his behavior changed. His letters changed. Our conversations changed. My experience with our relationship changed. And, as I studied it out in my mind, I became increasingly concerned. Enter: a servant of the Lord, my Bishop. In preparation for April general conference, which was just two weeks away, my Bishop taught me a truth I had never known before. Although I hadn’t spoken to him about my engagement or my concerns, when my Bishop offered this truth over the pulpit, he was speaking to me. He didn’t use my name-but I knew-he was talking directly to me. He even let others listen in. But clearly, he was speaking to me. Here’s the truth my Bishop spoke: “If you have a question that you need answered, if you will prayerfully and humbly listen to general conference, you will get it answered every time. Perhaps at the time, perhaps over time, but you WILL get your question answered every time!” Did I have a question?!! Absolutely. And I was desperate for an answer from the Lord. I prepared myself for that general conference by fasting and praying-and by purchasing blank audiotapes. Now, I realize that audiotapes are not typically requisite for listening to general conference, however this was in the days that not all conference sessions were broadcast to Canada, and I wanted to audiotape the sessions for my Mom and Dad. I can still picture the Saturday of that April general conference. I listened eagerly to every talk. I listened with my ears, mind and heart poised and ready to hear the answer to my question: “Should I marry this man?”
I experienced this day of general conference unlike any other. It was a highly unusual day of talks, because each and every talk was on marriage! Every single talk! Multiple speakers-but only one topic: marriage-or so it seemed. And the most amazing thing to me was that at the end of all those Saturday addresses on marriage, the clear answer I received was, “Don’t marry this man.”
I can still picture, at the conclusion of conference, turning off the TV, shutting off the cassette recorder, and walking directly and calmly to the telephone, and dialing my fiancé’s number to cancel our engagement. I wasn’t nervous at all. I was at peace. I had asked. And I had received my answer. So, what’s a young woman to do when she has asked, and then heard and felt the voice of the Lord telling her what to do? What’s a young woman to do…but to follow through?
Fast forward several years. My ex-fiancé is married and he appears to be happily involved in family life. I have completed my Masters degree, have worked a couple of years, moved to a new city, dated some great men, and continued to be directed by the Lord to pursue further education.
Another fast forward a couple of years: It is Christmas time and among the cards and letters is something from my ex-fiancé. It is a lengthy, hand-written letter from this now- no-longer-young man, declaring that he is choosing a life-style inconsistent with Gospel teachings and Church standards, and telling me of the sorrow that has come to his wife and family since their recent divorce and his declaration.
My dear young brothers and sisters, things are not always the way they appear to be!
Years ago on that Saturday evening when I ended my engagement, it seemed to many people-many who chided me for the breakup, many who tried to convince me to change my mind-that I was terminating a relationship with a marvelous young man-a man with whom I could experience much love and joy, as we entered into the covenant of marriage, and commenced raising up a family to the Lord.
How unkind could I be?! How cruel! How unwise to turn away from this great man and his love-especially at my age (I was 24 after all!!) To many people, it seemed like I was throwing away an opportunity of a life-time.. But-things are not always the way they appear to be. The Lord knew this young man’s heart, mind and actions. And when I asked-with as much preparation and faith as I could muster-and as I listened to the messages of general conference-I was guided (some days it still feels more like “snatched”) away from something that looked good-but wasn’t.
One last fast forward: It is now 6 months following receiving that Christmas letter of declaration. I am asked to prepare a Relief Society lesson on marriage. Of course I will-and I know just the audiotapes to review to find an excerpt from a general conference address on marriage, to supplement my lesson.
I remember finding the clearly marked tapes, and with anticipation, pushing the “play” button on the tape player. And then, I remember listening and listening for hours, as the talks played on and on. But something was different about the talks this time. Something was missing. To my dismay, there was nothing-absolutely nothing….about marriage! Not one talk-was on marriage!
It had been the Spirit of the Lord that had taught me as I listened to general conference. The Spirit had helped me to hear exactly what I needed to hear.
General conference had been the vehicle. The Spirit had been the messenger. “Don’t marry this man” had been the message from the Lord. And for that, I will be eternally grateful.
(Wendy Watson, Things are Not Always the Way They Appear to Be, BYU Devotional, March 19. 2002)
Bio:
My husband, Israel, and I live in North Saratoga Springs, Utah. We have two handsome boys, Mikey and Mark, who are wonderfully unique and spunky, and we love being their parents. I served in the church congregation first teaching my older son's class, and I now serve in the Relief Society Presidency as the 2nd counselor. My husband is the director of the annual latino event at Temple Square called “Light of the Nations” and he also conducts the Spanish choir for the event.
Sister Nelson posed a question, “Are we ready for General Conference?” And “What can we do (in the next week) to prepare our hearts and minds to receive the messages that the Lord has for us?”
Some people prepare by:
- Having a special fast,
- Forgiving someone,
- Increasing their time in family history and temple work or
- Doing an anonymous act of service (something that requires sacrifice).
- We may need to give up one of our sins, maybe even our favorite sin, as a way to prepare our hearts for conference.
One of Sister Watson’s favorite things to do to prepare and which has helped her the most is to think about and ponder what one question we need answered from the Lord during General Conference. That is something I’ve decided to try as an experiment this Conference.
When I take that one question to Gen Conf, that the Holy Ghost will bring me the answer I’m desperately seeking. I like the idea of focusing on one question, because I have a lot of questions. I even have a few that are tabled for when I have a chance to ask Heavenly Father directly after this life, but we should focus on what one question we need answered for our circumstances now.
She told a story from when she was 24 years old at BYU in graduate school. She was engaged to be married. She was very in love and her fiancée had everything she was looking for in a husband, everything that one would check off a list. Everything was going great and she went to the temple to ask the Lord if he was the man that she should marry. And, we all know that the decision of who to choose as a spouse is a very important one.
As she and her friend were leaving the temple to walk home, her friend asked if she had gotten the answer she was seeking. She told her friend that she hadn’t really received an answer, but that she was sure everything would work out. She learned that when she says, “everything will work out,” that is when the Lord kicks things into high gear and reveals what she needs to know. At church, her bishop challenged her ward that if they had a question or a problem weighing on their mind, to take it to General Conference, and he promised that they would receive an answer.
She did what her bishop said and prepared to take the one question she most needed answered, “Should she marry this man.” She was all alone in her apartment and was recording the conference sessions on cassette tapes to send to her family in Canada. And something interesting happened that Conference. Even though no talks are assigned for General Conference, every talk was about marriage. And the message she received through the Holy Ghost was that she should not marry her fiancée at the time. At the end of the Conference, she went straight to the phone and called him and ended the engagement/ broke up with him. He was not happy and it was a really hard thing to follow.
Many years later she received a Christmas card from her former boyfriend and he wrote her a letter telling her that he had made some choices that were contrary to the teachings of the church and that he was leaving the church and his family. That was a confirmation to her that she had made the right decision.
We don’t always have such a clear confirmation. Sometimes when we get an answer from the Lord, we just need to follow in faith, knowing that it is what we should do. But we don’t always see proof that our choices are correct. I was thinking of the 9th article of faith:
"We believe all the Lord has revealed, all that he does now reveal, and we believe that he will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the kingdom of God.”
We also read in the Bible, in Amos 3:7, "Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secrets to his servants, the prophets."
We know that the Prophet receives revelation for the church and that we are able to receive personal revelation for ourselves and our families directly from the Holy Ghost.
At BYU, my favorite religion class was Teachings of the Living Prophets, taught by Brother Lloyd Newell who is the narrator of Music and the Spoken Word. We had an assignment to search through all the published messages from the past prophets, the current prophet at the time (President Gordon B. Hinckley) and the apostles, with a focus on the most recent words. At that time, my question was, "What is the Lord's message to those who suffer for mental health?" I researched, and all I could find was one talk that President Hinckley had given at a luncheon for mental health providers; it wasn’t even given at Conference. I love that now there have been lots of talks related to the topic of mental illness and depression, anxiety. I know that the Lord is mindful of those who suffer from those trials. It’s a further testimony to me that the Lord continues to reveal the messages we need for our day."
I want to share my testimony that I know that this is Lord’s church. I know that President Nelson is a true prophet who leads the church today, and I love the direction that he has been taking the church, focusing on personal revelation.
I know that if we will take a question to the Lord in preparation for Conference that we will receive an answer and we will hear what it is that we need to learn. I am thankful for our Savior, Jesus Christ, for His atonement that has provided a way for us to return to live with our Heavenly Father again someday. He has given us the beautiful gift of repentance so that we can be forgiven of our sins when we make mistakes and that we can become more like him.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Below is the full talk by Sister Wendy Watson (Nelson), Things are Not Always the Way They Appear to Be, from a BYU Devotional on March 19. 2002
Things are not always the way they appear to be. I learned this, in a very personal way, when I was about your age. I was 24, doing graduate work at BYU (Provo), wildly in love and engaged to be married. The young man seemed to be my absolute dream guy: Returned missionary, well educated, employed, musical, handsome, great social skills, loved my family, and committed to keeping the Lord’s commandments. ALL the attributes and abilities, on my “husband-to-be wish list”, were there! He had them all…or so it seemed. And talk about a courtship! He wrote me poems, songs, and letters of love. What a guy! A man with the same desires for marriage and family-and for life-as I had. Or so I thought.
I was teaching family history in my BYU ward at the time, and with some compelling insights about the importance of the temple which I had gained through this calling, I chose to receive my endowments a few months prior to the time I was to be married in the temple. What a blessing temple attendance was for me! As I returned to the temple week after week, my world view started to open up, to change. And my view of myself and my fiancé followed. I can clearly see in my mind’s eye the day that I walked out of the Provo temple, after having gone fasting and praying, seeking an answer to a question that had started to haunt me: “Should I marry this man?”. A friend who had accompanied me to the temple that day asked, “Well, did you get your question answered?” I replied: “I didn’t get an answer-but I know that everything is going to work out.”
Freeze frame. I’ve learned through subsequent experiences, that the Spirit of the Lord is involved whenever I find myself saying: “Everything is going to work out”. Little did I know just HOW everything was going to work out!
It seemed that from the very minute I said those words, the Spirit whispered to my fiancé, who was working in another state: “Show her what you’re really like.” As the days and weeks unfolded, his behavior changed. His letters changed. Our conversations changed. My experience with our relationship changed. And, as I studied it out in my mind, I became increasingly concerned. Enter: a servant of the Lord, my Bishop. In preparation for April general conference, which was just two weeks away, my Bishop taught me a truth I had never known before. Although I hadn’t spoken to him about my engagement or my concerns, when my Bishop offered this truth over the pulpit, he was speaking to me. He didn’t use my name-but I knew-he was talking directly to me. He even let others listen in. But clearly, he was speaking to me. Here’s the truth my Bishop spoke: “If you have a question that you need answered, if you will prayerfully and humbly listen to general conference, you will get it answered every time. Perhaps at the time, perhaps over time, but you WILL get your question answered every time!” Did I have a question?!! Absolutely. And I was desperate for an answer from the Lord. I prepared myself for that general conference by fasting and praying-and by purchasing blank audiotapes. Now, I realize that audiotapes are not typically requisite for listening to general conference, however this was in the days that not all conference sessions were broadcast to Canada, and I wanted to audiotape the sessions for my Mom and Dad. I can still picture the Saturday of that April general conference. I listened eagerly to every talk. I listened with my ears, mind and heart poised and ready to hear the answer to my question: “Should I marry this man?”
I experienced this day of general conference unlike any other. It was a highly unusual day of talks, because each and every talk was on marriage! Every single talk! Multiple speakers-but only one topic: marriage-or so it seemed. And the most amazing thing to me was that at the end of all those Saturday addresses on marriage, the clear answer I received was, “Don’t marry this man.”
I can still picture, at the conclusion of conference, turning off the TV, shutting off the cassette recorder, and walking directly and calmly to the telephone, and dialing my fiancé’s number to cancel our engagement. I wasn’t nervous at all. I was at peace. I had asked. And I had received my answer. So, what’s a young woman to do when she has asked, and then heard and felt the voice of the Lord telling her what to do? What’s a young woman to do…but to follow through?
Fast forward several years. My ex-fiancé is married and he appears to be happily involved in family life. I have completed my Masters degree, have worked a couple of years, moved to a new city, dated some great men, and continued to be directed by the Lord to pursue further education.
Another fast forward a couple of years: It is Christmas time and among the cards and letters is something from my ex-fiancé. It is a lengthy, hand-written letter from this now- no-longer-young man, declaring that he is choosing a life-style inconsistent with Gospel teachings and Church standards, and telling me of the sorrow that has come to his wife and family since their recent divorce and his declaration.
My dear young brothers and sisters, things are not always the way they appear to be!
Years ago on that Saturday evening when I ended my engagement, it seemed to many people-many who chided me for the breakup, many who tried to convince me to change my mind-that I was terminating a relationship with a marvelous young man-a man with whom I could experience much love and joy, as we entered into the covenant of marriage, and commenced raising up a family to the Lord.
How unkind could I be?! How cruel! How unwise to turn away from this great man and his love-especially at my age (I was 24 after all!!) To many people, it seemed like I was throwing away an opportunity of a life-time.. But-things are not always the way they appear to be. The Lord knew this young man’s heart, mind and actions. And when I asked-with as much preparation and faith as I could muster-and as I listened to the messages of general conference-I was guided (some days it still feels more like “snatched”) away from something that looked good-but wasn’t.
One last fast forward: It is now 6 months following receiving that Christmas letter of declaration. I am asked to prepare a Relief Society lesson on marriage. Of course I will-and I know just the audiotapes to review to find an excerpt from a general conference address on marriage, to supplement my lesson.
I remember finding the clearly marked tapes, and with anticipation, pushing the “play” button on the tape player. And then, I remember listening and listening for hours, as the talks played on and on. But something was different about the talks this time. Something was missing. To my dismay, there was nothing-absolutely nothing….about marriage! Not one talk-was on marriage!
It had been the Spirit of the Lord that had taught me as I listened to general conference. The Spirit had helped me to hear exactly what I needed to hear.
General conference had been the vehicle. The Spirit had been the messenger. “Don’t marry this man” had been the message from the Lord. And for that, I will be eternally grateful.
(Wendy Watson, Things are Not Always the Way They Appear to Be, BYU Devotional, March 19. 2002)
Bio:
My husband, Israel, and I live in North Saratoga Springs, Utah. We have two handsome boys, Mikey and Mark, who are wonderfully unique and spunky, and we love being their parents. I served in the church congregation first teaching my older son's class, and I now serve in the Relief Society Presidency as the 2nd counselor. My husband is the director of the annual latino event at Temple Square called “Light of the Nations” and he also conducts the Spanish choir for the event.
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